Hot and cold.

Arrrrgh I need  my sanity please oh please.
Where do I start?  Oh Well!  I went  out with  my team from work and ended  up dancing  with  my tl all night And flirting  on the dance floor. We came  back to his all smiles happy  and drunk.
My team  members  were very shocked  and Some  where  happy others hated it while  the rest  went  with it. My tl and I ended  up sleeping together  but No sex or kissing. We almost  did  but we were  both  conscious.
We cuddled a lot and spoke  till we fell asleep.
Well back  to work  and we are all acting  like  Nothing happened but I noticed  he became impatient with  me then nice then ignored me then act nice  again.
So I told  him we needed  to talk and he agreed. The talk lead to tears, hugs,laffs and progress report.
Things went  cool for the rest of the day.
Went  back to hot and colD SIGNALs again. I have  tried  to figure out the deal  but can't  on his last  day before holiday we spoke  after  work  and I said  I was  gonna  miss him. He threw me back by saying  I will miss every one too.am like  why r u hot and cold  he said Because he doesn't  wanna  lose  his job.he has to watch  what  he says. Am like  OK. Fine  and I walked away.  It hurts that  am single  but nothing comes  easy....Kim from real wives of altanta  meant  her husband when  she lest expected it I bet mind is round the corner too..
I have  been  through  three major  heart breaks I don't  need another.
So am gonna  move on.every  little intimate secs  my tl &i spent  will now be deleted from my head. I can't  chase man.men should  chase  me  .am very  hot tall funloving smart smell nice loyal educated  I don't  need  to chase  men or beg men. I know my man is some where out there .and he would  find me soon.  I just  need to be patient and pray. So here  goes:
I pray to God that  I meet  some one who would love  me for real and not be  afraid  to show it. He would love  me like  crazy  and be very  protective  caring and God fearing. He would  respect me and be jealous. He would  accept me for  me and not betray my love.
I don't  care if he is white or black as long as he loves  me and not hurt me.
My birthday is round  d corner  I need  a change in my relationship status  .I WANT TO BE TRULY LOVED.

Rants rants .com

Yaaay Friday was fun I loved it.I went out With my work mate s. We went for drinks at my bosses house and then went clubbing.  Bumping and grinding  made my boss  hooked  on me. Slept over  and cuddled  with  my boss. Alnight it was So cool  I had fun.
Best night ever.... I wish it was real but only time will tell... we cuddled face to face and he held me So tight.
But No sex or kisses.today  is work what will be the out come? Am So scared.....

Rants raw rants

Well safe to say am not the only girl in group there are four more girls. Nothing new  okay  girls So am not scared or shakened....
Anyways, am just  chilling and waiting for  my Mister right.  My sister  sent  me  an SMS today.saying to stop  asking  my dad for money because he paid  my school fees. Am like  are u high ? And told her to mind her business. Silly hag.
moving on!
Why sister  keeps  fighting  me is a mystery.  Am sick and tired  of her stupid behavior. So annoying.
......................................
So far, I have  been busy  with  work... it's  quite interesting. I've been  giving a target  of 7 emails per hour. My tl is still  very  nice  to me So no cause for alarm.
However, my team members think  my tl gives  me special treatment but I beg to differ.
My dad rang to pray for me and he said "ask God to help you with business,marriage and good health". I feel bad because I think my dad is worried that  am not  seeing anyone. So sad I almost  cried.
Today  I prayed  to God to help me find true love.

ATTENTION MR  RIGHT.....
  Dear  Mr right comeout, come out, where ever u r.show  urself,I don't  wanna  be alone any further .
I wanna  be able  to spend weekends with  you.
I wanna  be able  to tell you  about  work  and stuff  I see.
I want  to be able  to hug and be hugged. And hear the  words I love  u and be able  to say it back.
I need  u now...

Mixed feelings

Well So far work  has been great. Thank u Jehovah.
I noticed at work  my Tl has been extra  nice  which is good  but then I noticed He is always  touching me like  not in bad way but  like  hands brushing  legs brushing.
Sharing of gum and mints  .going  half on chicken wings.
Cracking jokes okay  Maybe  am over  thinking but still  feels  different  and am scared  that it might  just be nothing.
And  then my friend  at work  told me oh look  I know  it's  So obvious  and Every one knows.
He is good  looking but then again  He probably is married.
My good friend David  said to just keep  being  me and if He likes  me He will  come out and say it.
Plus  my team members  don't  even talk  to me am d only  girl  For  now  but  still every time I try to chat  with  them  they go all mono syllable on me.
I feel  strange  and  alone.
......

Le struggle continues

So been a while  eh!
Well quick  update  So I have finished  training  yay!  But now the real  deal  begins. I will  have  you know   night  shift  is hard  especially at 5 in the morning  yup.
Who  ever said  dorks make up d night  team lied  cause   there are hunks up in here  ( high  fiving no one  in particular ) plus  am the only  female  in my  group  sucks  right?  I know
Moving on
For  d past four  days  I have been   dying in pain.  Yup  sore tongue  that shit be painful.
My  goodness  I couldn't  eat  or sleep  it was terrible  but thank God am getting  better
I miss  my mum  So much  as well as real  home  cooked  meals  arrrrrgh.

Moving 
Plans  for my days off well
Make  my hair  and sleep  alot  it is needed.

So at work  last nite my workmate  asked  if I drive  to work  I said no  she like So how do  u get here am like  bus  and she goes  wow what's it like  ? Mmmmm stupid question  requires  stupid answer So I said well There  are seats  windows  a man to drive  the bus........ she laffed  at her stupidity......

So coming home to  see different faces in my flat  yup  girls  every where  Who are they I asked  myself mentally.
Well  I guess when  u live  with  two guys  u Get to meet  loads of girls  in the house.
Not  impressed So far....