Le struggle continues

So I moved  into  my new place  last nite  and not bad I must  add not bad... very  clean  and organised...

Life of d singles.  I don't  think  Am making good use of my time. I shouldn't be sleeping I should be putting myself out there for that  is the only way  Am gonna meet any guy.
I need  to device  a plan or should  I just  date online?  What if the guy turns out  to be a psycho. Nah I can't  Am too scared.. but  i  don't  want to be very single for ever  So wat  do u suggest?
Moving on.. I have  a plan it involves me dressing up and stopping over  having  a meal before heading to work.
But looking  nice and smiling... What if my Mister right is not in this country?  What if Am wasting  my time?
Hey janet Jackson  did find d love of her life  and he is a  f#$&*ing billionaire  What  a happy  ending. I Am sure  my happy  ending is waiting  round  the  corner  for me.
I guess in life Since we are all imperfect the best way to win is to try try keep trying  till we succeed.
I Am prepared to keep trying and wait  patiently  for my Mister right  some one  who would love  me and cherish  me for me.I will take care  of him and he would do d same.
Once  again I give  God all the glory  for he is good  and I Thank him  and Am willing to wait for my blessing   

Scattered thots

Hey there!  woke up late. And  ran all  the way to the bus station  with  out  make  up ...yup   stressed  as fuck..
First  my mum woke  me up with  oh daddy  said he Is not  gonna  pay for ur ticket  to come  back..
And he doesn't  have  ur number   Am like  wow!!  Really  like  Wat  a way to start  ma day.
With  So much going  on. I just  don't  need  this negativity....
Then  dad called  to insult me and finish  off by saying  I don't  have  any money  to give  u Am like  cool..
Well to be fair  I place  the fone on my laps  and looked  out the window  and when  he was done I picked  the fone back up But he already  hung up.
Yup  slience  is just  the best  answer....
All I have  to say is things  will  get better
Things  will get better
Thank  u God for ur blessings .I Am very  grateful..
Please  protect me and provide for me.
As u have  always  done.
Loads  of love
Ur daughter. Xx

God is real

Remember  my going  broke situation of all situations? Anyway quick update  my landlord gave  me a quick  and very  scary  speech  of leave  my house  if u don't  pay me in 3 days ...
Am like  it's  all good.  So I packed my stuff  and moved  to my friends place  ..but did dat  let  me down?  Nope  it did  not  I continued to pray and wait  on God...  believe  it or not  he does  come through.
A friend of mine "j " who is pretty cool   about  letting me stay over.
Wop wop!!

Le struggle...

Should life be this  hard  ? I don't  think so...... I need  cash badly broke... helpless...
But in all things  we give  God d glory...

Another struggling day in another man's land...

Hi  there  to no one in particular,  so remember  my well  planned stake out  ? Well  it didn't  work.. I checked my account  and found  13.00 pounds...  I know  things will  get better  but  why are things  so rough  for me it is not like  I was mean to any one  or I did  not  help people  when  I had the chance..
I have  a return  ticket  to go home  but to even get to the airport  I don't  have  cash   except  the 13.00 I don't  want  to return  in shame. No present for my mum  or friends  I know  it's Canada  but come  on I refuse  to go back defeated.
I should  be able  to make it or don't  u think  so?
For some  reason  I don't  feel nothing  as I feel nothing  but defeat.  Well I tried  sha  now to mind my business  and look  on...  I don't  know if God is upset with  me for  sumthing  I have  done  but  please  spare  me father  my woes are just  to much  for me to bear....

Scattered thots

Strange so strange, am currently  on a 7.58 bus  and it's filled  with school  kids  that  is not surprising but the shocking  part  is they are quiet very  quiet  even as I listen to music  with  earphones on I feel  like  am noisy  kinda disturbing the peace.  

This is very  scary, have I been kidnapped or is this  a dream?  Questions questions ?
moving on swiftly>>>>>>>>>>>>>> So today is the 9th with  my rent  issues still  in full  force. And very scared  I  am....  what  to do. Finally  I call on to God to please save  me... I need help  real  help.... 

I don't  want  to be kicked  out with  no one to truly  help me. I recently found out  that  religious leaders  don't trust  their members  but  want  their members  to trust  em....funny  so funny...  anyways  my friend said  he  is  gonna help.  But let see how It  goes I don't  think he will  but any ways let's see how da  day unfolds.....

Raining trainning

So am kinda  of late  for work today .  Yup! my  training  starts  at  9.am today  but  for some reason   am  not  sure  but am on an 8.26 bus " who does  that? ". Anyways  am  like  on the bus and  there right there blast  from the past I see my former  classmate  on my bus  looking  so fly ( not really) and am like  in a dorkey sweater and sloppy  shoes  arrrrrrgh.
  While she is carrying  a zara  hand bag very  classy I must  add. i am  wearing my  one and only  green Canadian sweater  and sloppy  newlook shoes;I bet she thinks  am  like  so  poor(** head down in shame **)
But  then again she is kinda  right  ya know.... no cash for now  but soon  really  soon. It will be alright.
@ Da  end of the tunnel  there is a light bulb I just  hope  the maintenance people  remembered  to  switch  it on..... turn on Da   light, turn da light   ***in Nelly furtardo 's  voice.. ***
Once  again  I just  wanna say thank  u God  for  preserving me please  I patiently wait  for my  miracle  do  help me and bless  me too.
Just  got off  training..  am so worried  in a funny mild  way.  My rent  on my mind ... should  I take  my return  and leave peacefully or should I stay and struggle?  Am I a quitter or surviver? So help me God....

Shocking (blast from the past)

Mmmm  where  do I begin....  so am kinda  of late on my rent and  is getting  so worried .I decided to ask for  assistance in church ,I spoke  to one of the elder and he said  he is not sure it would  happen because  they are not sure  I would pay back. Am shocked and disappointed because I thought  the church  members are suppose to trust  their flock?  If they  can't  help  me in my current situation   because of trust issues then am  sorry  but y r we ur members .just  sad  I wonder  y all this  money issue is affecting me?  Am so tired of this all we.I need ur help  Jehovah God  and I need it fast please  today too.. thank u.

As a temp

I must  confess  the best  time  to meet or see a "raw sexy guy"is in the am.  Yup sexy builders  do it for me. So hotttttt  damn.
So as a customer  care advisor (in training ) I get to catch the 6.44/6.58 bus to werk (work ) I still  can't  understand  how much  energy  I possess  I guess  it is safe  to  say am an overly energetic enthusiastic sexy  babe.....
What  am I looking  forward  too today  at  werk  ....learning, talking  to people  and majorly  staring at hottttttt  looking  guys.
Am balling  for  two. Hold up! Is this  old man in his early  80's chatting  me up. Thank God for earphones....   just  smile  sweetie  u never  know  ... ur smile  could  / may/ will  /elevate  his day.
Dear  God ,thank u for the opportunity...  amen.....
Now  let's  rotate...  
don't  goooooooo  I scream loudly  in my head  as I watch the sexist  dude in the AM... get off the bus.sooooo  sad... ...well more to see around  my office... I pray ( mentally doing  the on bended knees prayer )

New beginings

Just  started  a new job in an online fashion company. Pretty cool eh! I know. No good looking man yet man...none what  so ever.
Dang it.tummy growling for  food  am ma be right  back......